Roast wall

#1Man launched a coin because the pawn shop stopped answering his calls.

#2His wallet has been empty so long it qualifies as a historic landmark.

#3Financial plan: step one, be famous. Step two, panic. Step three, coin.

#4He's not chasing a bull run, he's outrunning a collections agency.

#5The only chart he understands is the one going down.

#6Portfolio diversification: seventeen different creditors.

#7Says he's early. Early to court, maybe.

#8The whitepaper is just a stack of final notices in a trench coat.

#9He bought the dip. The dip was his own credit score.

#10Zero tax on the coin because the IRS already took the parking spot.

#11This coin has more red flags than a parade in Beijing.

#12Roadmap phase one: get broke. Phase two: stay broke, but publicly.

#13The audit was performed by a guy named Todd at a bar.

#14Liquidity locked. Behind a door. That he lost the key to.

#15He calls it passive income. The passive part is doing all the work.

#16First rug in history where the rug was also repossessed.

#17His financial advisor is a fortune cookie with trust issues.

#18The ticker is $BROKE because $HUMBLE was taken by someone solvent.